Success Criteria : I am successful when I write in paragraphs, use capital letters and full stops correctly,and in order.
During the holidays my family and I went to paradise ice skating. We went on a Saturday. It was really cool because there were lights.
First we went to pay to the counter to skate. When we payed,we went inside and it was crowded.
The lady gives out skates to only who comes there and skate.
Next we told our shoe sizes and she gave us blue shiny skates. Then we went on the ice and skated. I skated fast and my sisters did
too.
So,when we continued skating,my mum went to buy McDonald for us. After my mum bought it,she told us to come in the car to eat.
She told us we are eating McDonald.
When after we ate we went inside,and we skated again for a bit.
Our mum told us we have to go home. I had fun going there.
I hope I can go there again soon.
Kia ora, ko Sasha taku ingoa
ReplyDeleteNo to kura o Karoro ahau.
I really enjoyed reading your recount about your family ice skating trip. You described everything you did really well. I liked how you described the lights and how there were lots of people there. I would of liked to see some photos of your family skating.
I really enjoy ice skating with my family. This reminded me of when I went ice skating in Queenstown a long time ago. The town we live in doesn’t have an ice skating rink. Was that your first time ice skating?
Next time you could reread your work to make sure everything makes sense. I found that you forgot the ‘s’ on the end of McDonalds. Other than that I thought that your recount was very interesting.
Keep up the great work.
From Sasha.